| Family & Relationships |
| Nervous System |
| Autism Spectrum Disorders |
| Health Care Issues |
| Urban & Community |
| Health & Fitness |
| Vaccinations |
| Children's Health |
Summary
Summary
Lina was a precocious toddler--charming, chatty, joyful. At the age of three, in the aftermath of her second MMR vaccine, first came a seizure, and then, to her parents' horror, the loss of Lina's ability to play, use language, and control her impulses. Over the next few years they continued to lose Lina. She communicated her acute discomfort by biting, screaming, hitting, laughing maniacally, and throwing violent tantrums. As a single mother, with the help of her ex-husband, Helena Hjalmarsson tirelessly pursued every possible avenue to find a diagnosis, and more importantly a treatment, for her daughter, and the search continues to this day. Lina is nine.
Special schools, restrictive diets, sensory stimulation, relationship-based therapy, gastrointestinal links, homeopathy, and allergy treatment are all explored in detail. Hjalmarsson finds out what helps Lina and what doesn't. She introduces sign language to Lina. She engages in lengthy daily intensive one-on-one sessions. With the help of her ex, angelic babysitters, Lina's exceptionally empathetic younger sister, and supportive friends, Hjalmarsson manages to create a meaningful life for Lina, and for herself--a life of love and transcendence.
Lina, for all her challenges, has much to teach, and Hjalmarsson is a receptive student: finding joy in moments of connection, learning to live in the present, taking nothing for granted, accepting what others find unbearable, and finding a strength and spiritual base for inspiration and healing.
Unflinchingly honest and courageous, Finding Lina will open the eyes and hearts and minds of all parents, whether they have a child with autism or not.
Author Notes
Helena Hjalmarsson , M.A., L.C.S.W., L.P., is a psychoanalyst in private practice in New York City. Her practice is informed by the idea that everything is interconnected, the healing powers of true acceptance, and a belief in living in the now. She is the coauthor of The Quotable Book Lover and her article "Transference Opportunities During the Therapist's Pregnancy" was published in Psychoanalytic Social Work . She lives in New York City with her two daughters, Lina and Elsa.
Reviews (4)
Publisher's Weekly Review
In the afterword of this intense memoir, Hjalmarsson writes, "I could keep writing this book until both Lina and I are walking around with canes, without teeth or memory," and the reader believes her. The obsessive documentation of her daughter Lina's sudden decline into autism and her quest for successful treatments make it clear that there is no day off for a parent of a child with disabilities as severe as Lina's. Hjalmarsson's passion for her daughter's cause is both impressive and daunting, and her occasional lapse into blaming doctors, strangers on the street, or places-Rhode Island fails to suit her needs, and she mourns "leaving the civilization of New York City"-can be off-putting, until readers remember her predicament. For any parent, the sense of there-but-for-the-grace-of-God is strong when confronted with stories of children succumbing to unexplainable illness, and Hjalmarsson earns the reader's sympathy with repeated tales from an impossibly hard daily life. Undaunted, the author follows traditional Western and more holistic paths in an attempt to find a cure; she certainly has much to teach about her medical and therapeutic trials, but her biggest lesson is helpful for all parents: we must not "get so ambitious in our quest to cure what we consider unacceptable that we forget to listen and be present." (Sept.) (c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.
Kirkus Review
The story of a mother's transformation in learning to care for her special needs daughter. At age 3, Hjalmarsson's (co-editor: The Quotable Book Lover, 1999) daughter, Lina, experienced seizures, became unresponsive and lost her speech. As Lina got increasingly difficult and destructive--screaming, biting, throwing tantrums and running from the house--Hjalmarsson tried a variety of techniques to help her daughter. She moved from the city to the suburbs and back again, tried out numerous schools and caregivers, and put Lina on special diets and medications, both traditional and alternative. While many of these attempts seemed to help Lina for a time, she invariably regressed. As a psychoanalyst, Hjalmarsson was perhaps more aware than many parents of the theories surrounding autism treatments, and she brings this knowledge to the book, offering detailed descriptions of each therapy and the ensuing results. But the book is more about the author herself and how she managed the difficulties of raising such a challenging child. Her marriage fell apart (although she and her husband remain close friends), and she was, fortunately, able to work part-time in order to dedicate her life almost exclusively to caring for Lina. One of the more interesting passages is a description of Hjalmarsson hiding from her daughter in the basement and then dashing into the yard in a desperate attempt to escape her. It's a powerful sequence, showing the extreme challenges of living with an autistic child, and more such scenes would add depth the memoir. At times, the level of detail, including descriptions of playtimes and the names of just about everyone Lina has encountered in her eight years, becomes tedious. But the author's positive, optimistic attitude and her thorough descriptions of therapies will be helpful to the parents and caretakers of autistic children.]] Copyright Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.
Booklist Review
In this honest memoir, Hjalmarsson (a psychoanalyst with a master's degree in child development) conveys the frustrations and the triumphs of raising an autistic daughter. She also explains how a special-needs kid affects the rest of the family in her case, her younger girl and her now ex-husband, Skyhorse publisher Tony Lyons. Until she was three, Lina (now nine), cheerfully played with friends. Then, after receiving her second MMR vaccine, she experienced a seizure and was diagnosed with the Epstein-Barr virus. How that relates to Lina's autism is left in question. Over the years, the family moves often, trying to find better neighborhoods and schools for Lina, whose behavior includes hitting, biting, peeing on the floor, and trying to run away. Strangers can be alarmingly judgmental and unsympathetic. The family tries everything, including acupuncture, herbal remedies, and dietary changes, while Hjalmarsson remains remarkably positive. She taught me to take life as it is, she writes. She showed me how to be happy and laughing in the midst of sorrow and loss. A passionate book for families with special-needs children.--Springen, Karen Copyright 2010 Booklist
Library Journal Review
Hjalmarsson (coeditor, The Quotable Book Lover) has endured a process most mothers never experience: the discovery, diagnosis, and treatment of a child with autism. In this emotional memoir, she shares these struggles through an intense discussion of how the treatment and love of a child with disabilities affects every facet of life, including marriage, the relationship to other children in the household, and a parent's own sense of self. And this is the book's stronger aspects. Unfortunately, it is rather awkwardly written with an inconsistent timeline, making readers of memoir confused and those reading for insights into help for their children with Autism frustrated. Verdict Although the emotional roller coaster is raw and engaging, this memoir falls far short of similar offerings such as Susan Senator's fabulous Making Peace with Autism: One Family's Story of Struggle, Discovery, and Unexpected Gifts and Eustacia Cutler's Thorn in My Pocket.-Victoria Frerichs, Prescot, UK (c) Copyright 2013. Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.
