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Material Type | Library | Call Number | Suggested Age | Status |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Book | Searching... Hamlin Public Library | 306.8743 NIC | Adult | Searching... Unknown |
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Summary
Summary
Being a mother is a hard, tiresome role that, although not regularly discussed, can often bring up feelings of sadness, anxiety, anger, disgust, and embarrassment, or as clinical psychologist and mother Claire Nicogassian Psy. D. calls them, shadow emotions. This compilation of clinical advice and practical strategies guides struggling mothers through understanding these shadow emotions, working on overcoming them and ultimately moving to a place of self-care, where they can enjoy mothering their children once again. Claire offers readers treatment from a variety of angles, with professional advice drawn from her 20 years as a psychologist, and personal insight from both her own experiences as a mother of four and the stories of her patients who've experienced similar hardships in parenting. The clinical focus explores different shadow emotions, helping mothers analyze the core of these feelings and identify triggers within themselves, suggesting strategies for cooling down, staying in control and working through the negative emotion. Unlike other parenting self-help books that focus on telling women to remain happy and positive, Claire teaches practical solutions, skills and strategies to help mothers move away from being controlled by their negative emotions and anxieties surrounding parenting, and into a place of well-being and balance.
Author Notes
Claire Nicogossian, PsyD, is a licensed clinical psychologist and a clinical instructor of psychiatry and human behavior at Brown University. She's the founder of MomsWellBeing.com, where you can find her writing, and the podcast In-Session with Dr. Claire. Her writing has appeared on Motherly, Scary Mommy, Thrive Global, TODAY Parenting Team, and Huff Post. Dr. Claire lives in Rhode Island with her husband and four daughters.
Reviews (1)
Library Journal Review
Shadow emotions such as sadness, fearfulness, guilt, and disgust are a part of every mom's life. In her first book, clinical psychologist Nicogassian gives readers the tools they need to care for their emotional selves. Readers may find relief in the normalcy of these emotions, comfort in knowing they don't need to act on them, and relief that shadow emotions don't mean you don't love your kids enough or are a bad mother. Negative and self-critical thinking increase the power of shadow emotions, and Nicogassian provides practical strategies for moving forward in the midst of unpleasant feelings. The author shares ideas for self-care in each of the main spheres: physical, emotional, cognitive, social, spiritual, and personal. VERDICT This volume will be a great resource for moms to kids of all ages and stages, from newborn to teen.
Table of Contents
| Preface | p. 1 |
| Introduction | p. 5 |
| Part I Learning to Thrive in Modern Motherhood | p. 12 |
| 1 The Key to Thriving in Motherhood: Understanding and Managing Your Emotions and Feelings | p. 13 |
| 2 A Guide to Self-Care in Modern Motherhood | p. 31 |
| Part II Embracing Sadness on the Path to Thriving | p. 46 |
| 3 Soothing the Tears | p. 52 |
| How to Embrace Sadness and Move Toward Hope | |
| 4 There's No Manual in Motherhood | p. 62 |
| Ways to Handle Feeling Ineffective and Defeated and Increase Your Confidence | |
| 5 Running on Empty | p. 75 |
| How Feeling Exhausted and Burned-Out Creates Opportunities to Grow | |
| 6 You Can't Undo the Past | p. 89 |
| A Guide to Managing Guilt and Developing More Self-Compassion | |
| 7 Reducing Loneliness in Motherhood | p. 101 |
| Skills and Strategies to Find Connection and Bring in Fun | |
| 8 Time Goes Slow and Children Grow Fast | p. 123 |
| How to Honor Your Feelings and Stay Present in the Midst of Missing and Longing | |
| 9 Transforming Suffering | p. 130 |
| The Steps to Take to Turn Despair into Hope, Meaning, and Purpose | |
| Part III Conquering Fear and Anxiety to Cultivate Calm | p. 140 |
| 10 Overcoming Anxiety | p. 145 |
| How to Manage Worry and Anxious Thoughts to Create Joy and Connect with Others | |
| 11 Finding Your Strengths | p. 158 |
| How to Transform Moments of Insecurity into Sources of Confidence | |
| 12 Fear Is a Great Teacher | p. 168 |
| How Embracing What You Are Afraid of Helps You to Develop Trust and Calm | |
| Part IV Using Anger as a Teacher for Growth and Joy | p. 178 |
| 13 The Red Flags of Anger | p. 182 |
| How Paying Attention to Irritability, Frustration, and Anger Is the Path of Self-Care and Joy | |
| 14 Healing the Roots of Pain | p. 211 |
| How to Transform Bitter and Resentful Feelings into Peacefulness, Acceptance, and Connection | |
| 15 Highlighting Abundance | p. 227 |
| How Feeling Jealousy and Envy Are Signals to Appreciate Your Strengths | |
| Part V Transforming Embarrassment and Shame into Self-Compassion | p. 240 |
| 16 The Uncomfortable Moments of Motherhood | p. 246 |
| Simple Ways to Bounce Back After an Awkward or Embarrassing Moment | |
| 17 The Hidden Suffering in Motherhood | p. 262 |
| How Letting Go of Humiliation and Shame Creates Space for Joy and Happiness | |
| Part VI Using Disgust and Self-Judgment as Chance to Heal | p. 288 |
| 18 Handling the Disgusting Moments of Motherhood | p. 292 |
| Keeping Perspective and a Sense of Humor | |
| 19 The Feelings Moms Have But Don't Say Out Loud | p. 302 |
| How Transforming Self-Hatred to Self-Love Is the Key to Joy | |
| Part VII Conclusion-Revealing Your True Motherly State of Joy, Calm, and Confidence | p. 316 |
| Endnotes | p. 323 |
| Acknowledgments | p. 324 |
| About the Author | p. 326 |
| Index | p. 327 |
